I woman had just given birth to a baby boy… The doctor was holding him and told the parent,”I regret to inform you that your son was born without eyelids.” The mother replies,” That’s terrible. What are we going to do?” The doctor says,” I’ve seen this before, don’t worry. We will circumcise him and…
A woman once gave birth to 100 children To avoid confusion, she simply named them after the number of their conception. Unfortunately all of them except for #90 died at a very young age. 90 was a little girl who grew up to be a great woman. She married at a young age and gave…
A teenage girl gives birth to twins and puts them up for adoption… She never hears from them again except for the news that one baby was adopted by a Mexican couple, and the other was adopted by a couple from the Middle East. Years later she hires a private investigator to track down her…
In an African tribe village, the chieftain’s wife gave birth to a white skinned child. The chieftain quickly figured the voluntary doctor from Europe might be to blame. So the chieftain asked him to talk in his tent. Chieftain: “Today my wife gave birth to a white child. She and I are dark skinned. You…
A woman giving birth went into a coma for a few days When she woke up, the doctor told her, “congratulations, you gave birth to healthy twins: a girl and a boy. Your ex-boyfriend visited and named them for you” The woman replies, “no not him! What did he name the boy?” Doctor: Mason Woman:…
My wife just gave birth today After thanking the doctor, I pulled him aside, and sheepishly asked, “How soon do you think we’ll be able to have sex?” He winked at me and said, “I’m off duty in ten minutes – meet me in the car park.” Credits to r/dadjokes
A redneck birth control After having the 10th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough since they could not afford another kid. So the husband went to his doctor and told him the he and his wife didn’t want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called…
A young boy comes down to breakfast one morning. His mother asks, “Have you done your chores yet?” “No,” replies the boy, “but could I have breakfast first?” “You know the rules, go outside and clean the chicken coop, milk the cow and feed the pigs.” The boy goes down to the chicken coop and…
A horse and a rabbit are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the rabbit to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The rabbit runs to the farm but the farmer can’t be found. So he drives the farmer’s…
I got drunk and went home with a Japanese porn star last night All in all it was nice but the good parts remain blurry
